And back to some senselessness (that’s what I think we’re only good at) if you think about it, there actually is something to be scared about. We know that China is just waiting to put up another factory of whatever catches the fancy of a lot of people; right from Hindu Gods to toys sold in Amsterdam to the various magical weight loss belts sold on TV shopping, everything these days is Made in China. Now, the thought is really scary – What if they start mass producing these chairs with polygraph machines and sell it at dirt cheap prices? Imagine a house full of MPs but nobody’s sitting; Nobody wants to sit on the Chair that otherwise they would die for…
But I’m not worried about them alone. I’m worried, if my wife replaces all our dining table chairs! I mean, how am I gonna answer her regular Friday evening question – Have you had a bath today? Oops, I’m letting out my ‘dirty’ secrets already… But no, seriously think about it. How will a student ever be able to write a good essay on ‘My School’? How will Pakistan get foreign aid by promising to fight Al Qaeda? How will Rakhi bullshit every suitor on her show by looking into his eyes and confessing her ‘undivided’ love for each one of them? More than her, how will the dulhas say “I lurrveee you” to Rakhi with a straight face knowing very well that the lie detector would be going bonkers? How will the US invade the remaining oil producing countries of the world screaming WMD? How will all the men confidently reply “Your eyes” when a woman asks what is it in me that you like the most? How will all the husbands in the world answer their wives perennial question “Am I looking fat in this dress?”
Come to think of it, man human being has gotten this far, thanks to a bunch of lies. Toddlers start learning it right from ‘Johny Johny, Yes Papa; Eating Sugar? No Papa’ beep… beep… beep… and then they never stop. We work our way through school and everytime mom asks ‘Homework kiya?’ we shout a loud ‘Yes’ beep… College is no different when every evening we gather at a friend’s place to ‘study’ beep…. How could we’ve told the truth that we watched porn last night? Or maybe we could say, we were watching an ‘educational video’ and the buzzer might not beep. We then profess our undying love for a girl and bullshit her by singing ‘I will ALWAYS love you’ and the girl bullshits us by pretending to believe our crap. Then at work, the same behavior continues. Just imagine, how will all of us bloggers be able to fill up our daily time-sheets? We don’t have a column for ‘Blogging’ in there… And Interviews, God No! If the lie detector chair’s False alarm would be a giggle, it would literally be Rolling on the Floor Laughing listening to us explain our virtues of honesty and dedication to work.
That gives me an idea – Should I patent this innovation where the chairs come in different ‘False’ alarm tones:
Standard – Beep
Rakhi (Of Karan Arjun fame) – Nahinnnnnn – Keh do yeh jhuth hai
Shatru – Khamosh
Raunchy – Nooooo
Oldie Goldie – Jhuth bole kauwa kaate…
And so on…
Ok now this innovative thinker in me is digging his own grave. But seriously, Truth is the only thing that is not sexy when ‘bare’. And what’s happening in SKS is a striptease of sorts. As we always know, our Culture is against stripping of any kind :-). So for a change, I’m with them on this one. Tell me, aren’t the MPs right in being shit scared? Aren’t you scared as well or is it just me?
Am i first ?
Rakesh, this was just an amazingly funny post! How do you come up with such innovative ideas?
I'm ROFL!
I honestly didn't know anything about the program, didn't even hear about it. Thanks to your post, now I know something! For that, I'm very grateful to you.
Okay, okay, okay,
Let's have my comment again with a lie detector on:
Rakesh, this was just an amazingly funny post! [beep] How do you come up with such innovative [beep] ideas?
I'm ROFL!
I honestly didn't know anything about the program, didn't even hear about it. Thanks to your post, now I know something! For that, I'm very grateful to you. [beep]
TC.
PS: Did you read my post–'Insanity personified' by any chance?
*ROFL–rolling on the floor lying–go figure, whatever it means. 😉
Rakesh, this was just an amazingly funny post! How do you come up with such innovative ideas?
I'm ROFL!
I honestly didn't know anything about the program, didn't even hear about it. Thanks to your post, now I know something! For that, I'm very grateful to you.
Okay, okay, okay,
Let's have my comment again with a lie detector on:
Rakesh, this was just an amazingly funny post! [beep] How do you come up with such innovative [beep] ideas?
I'm ROFL!
I honestly didn't know anything about the program, didn't even hear about it. Thanks to your post, now I know something! For that, I'm very grateful to you. [beep]
TC.
PS: Did you read my post–'Insanity personified' by any chance?
*ROFL–rolling on the floor lying–go figure, whatever it means. 😉
Hello Rakesh 🙂
I loved ur blog header… mashallah he's very cute… love his eyes 🙂
Hope Hayaa is good too 🙂
No Teddy isn't back 🙂 He's long gone.
Take care..
Have a great week ahead! 🙂
@Dhiren: I thought we'd grown up 😛
@Ketan: See, imagine how would I be able to write those nice comments on your blog about intellectual orgasms and all 😛
No I didn't read that post and couldn't find it. Drop me a link.
@WS: I know, his eyes are so naughty when he smiles… Hayaa is doing well as well. Listen, do check out the latest videos – http://hayaa-yuvaan.blogspot.com
Thanks 🙂
I meant Teddy is back on your blog!
LOL..I agree..It's a case of Much Ado Abt Nothing..these MPs have no better work to do..they rake up such silly issues..
I'd seen this morality debate on TIMES NOW..it was awesome..Do chk this:
http://www.timesnow.tv/Debate-Are-we-in-denial-about-reality-shown-on-TV/videoshow/4323046.cms
All these MPs shud b grilled on the hot seat!! sab pata chal jaayga!
Btw, Rajiv Khandelwal is just too cute..I really adore him..
Gosh, this post got me laughing… If China makes those chairs, America better do something about it. Seriously! Life ain't fun without exaggerations!
Rakesh,
The [beep] when you put nice comments on my posts would be for 'nice', for 'intellectual' or for 'orgasm'?
This (click) is the link. Though, the post is long, don't take a printout as it has many links in it. And it doesn't have much to do with the medical field as I'm sure you'd be able to quite relate with it. 🙂
TC.
know what? This post has been openber since the last 6-7 hours. Finally I read it. Great post Rakesh, besides teh rib tickling humour, indeed, its teh strip tease that's scaring the shit out of everyone!
No, I'm not scared coz I'm an expert liar. Even in situations which don't require me to lie, I lie. 🙂
and more over lie detectors are only 61% times correct. So even if you are a reasonable liar, you should get along just fine.
As for our netas, I think they are getting unnecessarily getting worried. Given the world class standards they have set in lying to their voters, they should pass this 'acid-test' with flying colors.
dude I have grown up just that i was back from mumbai to check the reader and the first post I saw
and I dont know but just couldnt resist…
I wrote a comment earlier but somehow it didnt go through…
We have some horrible programmes and we have some even more horrible politicians…
just read Indy's post and it fills me with disgust how we are developing as a nation…
Hilarious!
LOL
@Swats: Interesting debate there… Yeah, I agree – Much ado about nothing…
@Terra: I know, America certainly has a lot more liars than India 😛
@Ketan: You gofigure 🙂 he he…
Yeah, I read that post and it confirmed my doubts about medical students 😛
@Passionate Goof: 6-7 hours… What were you looking at? Btw, you are sounding drunk? 😛
@ASardar: Paaji, I guess, I'm a good boy and so rightfully scared… 😛
@Dhiren: Yeah Indy's post does touch a nerve… And the best our MPs can do is discuss prime time TV.
@Masood: Tks 🙂
Politicians, the lesser spoken about them, the better!
Hats off to the comment on common sense! Awesome, loved it!
ROFL! Loved the 'false' alarm tones.
Our MPs are just guarding our culture. We should all support them!
Cheers,
Quirky Indian
I do not know whether it's just you or not, but I am definitely not wary or scared of it.
If politicians are scared o fit cuz they know if at all any of them agree to appear he will be raped literally. Moreover, forget about the scared part, They argued saying it is not appropriate for audiences. Fuck.. then what is appropriate? Watching them throw chappals and shoes and abuses on each other.. That is cheapness beyond comprehension. And here at least the truth is coming out. Person answering knows exactly what he or she is going to get through and their family or frenz are aware equally, so whats the fuss about being scared. If they cannot watch it , switch off. Simple.
Ha.ha..ha.. Sach ka saamna is giving MPs sleepless nights because they fear someone will come up on the show and spill their secrets..you know the 'one night stands' or 'some deals'.
They are fine with regressive shows where women is showed as a doormat keeping our "bharatiya sanskriti and sabhyata".
And I am sure your wife won't need any lie detector. She just needs to have hightened 5 senses. Ha..ha..ha..
Our netas have no clue of the national issues like corruption,security,inflation,farmer suicides etc.The only issues left for them are these shows and their own security concerns.I wonder-do we wonder-is it worth the wonder that one MP should be forced to sit on this programme as a participant
LMAO ur a superfunny 'nerd'! Thats a compliment btw 🙂
** I’m worried, if my wife replaces all our dining table chairs!
HAHAHAHA!
**that such programmes are destroying our culture.
maybe those MPs need to re-evaluate and re-check what their JOBS r abt. Gosh dun they hv alot of OTHER things to discuss abt the future of India other than reality shows!!!!!!
Keshi.
@Rakesh: At least these politicians keep our blogs going 😛
@Quirky: Trust you to love our million years old culture… After all, you're still in that age 😛
@Vee: Yeah, after you've confessed about orgys in the 25 tag, you shouldn't be scared of anything. lol…
@Solilo: Now you're scaring me Sol…
@Chowla ji: Exactly, this should be compulsory for the netas 🙂
@Keshi: I would take that as a compliment even if you didn't clarify 🙂
And IHM said the same thing on her blog – since all other problems of our country have been solved, let the MPs discuss TV shows.
LOL yeah I'm sure they are making such an issue coz they are petrified.
What a post Rakesh! :D:D
you ahve a hyperactive imagination!:D to come up with all the hypothetical scenarios?:D:D
wah!
Imagine a house full of MPs but nobody’s sitting; Nobody wants to sit on the Chair that otherwise they would die for…
HILARIOUS!! the image that came to mind! :D:D
sach ka samna petrifies our netas and their atmas… its their worst nightmare come true..it is any wonder they are protesting?
the sanksriti talk is BS!
@Neha: 'petrified' is the word 🙂
@Indy: Hyperactivity is good, I guess it sheds the flab off my brains 🙂
Rakesh, That was one ROFL post! I missed this – was on my break at that time 😦 But I laughed so much today! Yes, our MPs are so right to be so scared 🙂 This was so apt and so funny!
Seriously…I echo wht most of them have written above…a super funny post with more than a grain of truth in it:-)).
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